Crossing over

in life there are phases.
it's something everyone has to go through.
surviving these phases shouldn't be hard,
the tough part will be switching between phases.

So, now this phase of my so called "terrible" studying life had ended,
the tough part will be growing up into reality.
Whether i want it or not, it's there.

I've tried running, not a very wise choice.
Running as in avoiding the fact that I'm now all on my own.
Placing all the grand and reasonable excuses
such as "I'm so tired I need a break" and "I want to go travel a bit" or "yeah, I'm planning."
and of course, travel does help a bit.

but inevitably, all these running must come to an end.
now I'll have to make a choice.

When I said travel helps, I literally meant traveling helps in my decision making.
I went to Singapore, partially alone, and met up a few friends there.
The whole city was opening it's arm to me
as if it is screaming for my presence.
well, i might exaggerate a little, but I felt very comfortable there.
And my friends were promoting the country as if they were trying to sell something.
I was convinced, because big city, hustling commutes and bright lights always amazes me.
And with the diverse population plus the development,
I literally fell in love with that place.
" and so i told myself, this is where I want to be for the next 10 years" XD

that's just the start.
Fun's over.

after I came back from the trip,
I found out that Daddy's plan of inserting me into that company is actually a real deal.
He had already made contact with his friends and indirectly mapped my future.
That means IF i succeed (which i most likely wont because I'm working hard not to)
I'll be tied up and stuck until I could afford a house or some other escape route.
I wouldn't want that to happen.

thus starts the race of landing a job in that country
and procrastinate as much as I could here.

Everyone is trying to fulfill a certain dream.
They doesn't move doesn't mean they're not working towards it.
Intervention could wait and serve as Plan B.
I was kinda disappointed when I heard that what I wanted to do is bullcrap to others.
I am not a conventional person where I want to settle down and get tied down.
I wanted to go places, see people and walk the path my way.
I know perhaps my way is not a very good way,
but please let me try it out.
That is what learning from experience meant.

I'm not going to comment on anything, and I'm certainly not complaining.
I understand the motives and I knew the risks.
For once I just want to have something done, in my own way.